What’s hot, what’s not

Listen folks, I may only be one day old, and I may not even have a name yet, but I have some serious opinions about life.

What’s hot: Breastfeeding.  I could do it all day.  Oh, wait – I do it all day.  Can’t get enough.  I’m pretty awesome at it if I do say so myself.

What’s not: Getting my diaper changed.  I hate that so bad.  Leave me alone, parentals and nurses – I’m content to sit and marinate in meconium. 

Hot: Fuzzy fleece blankets.  Swaddle me as tightly as you wish, I love those things.

Not: Scratchy hospital-issue blankets.  Come on, other (no doubt inferior) babies have probably peed on those.  Sheesh. 

Not:  That stupid transparent hospital crib you roll me around in.  Seriously, you call that a mattress?  Sure, a mattress fit for rodents.  Just try sticking me in one of those – I’ll have you wishing you were deaf in a matter of seconds.

Hot:  Mommy’s chest, Daddy’s chest, or snuggled next to Mommy on her hospital bed.  With a fuzzy fleece blanket. 

Hot:  Having my back or bum patted.  Totally relaxes me.

Not:  Mommy singing.  Just… just… just STOP, Mom.  Nice try, though.

The business of giving birth

Last Friday, I had an ultrasound and was informed that my baby was in the 94th percentile for size.  I was glad the baby was healthy, but I was extremely terrified of giving birth to a large baby and had visions of wearing diapers forever more on account of my pelvic floor being destroyed. 

I became anxious (to say the least) to give birth as soon as possible.  When my doctor refused to assist in my scheming, I knew I’d have to take matters into my own hands and spent some time researching natural labor induction with the help of the world wide webs. 

Tuesday I ate pineapple and mango.

Wednesday I went jogging with Squiggles.  I knew I wasn’t exactly as nimble as a cheetah, but I felt good going at what I thought was a nice clip, with the wind in my hair.  Squiggles kept saying, “Mommy jogging so fast.”  Then I passed a group of 5- or 6-year-old boys pointing at me and overheard one of them say, “I think it’s a zombie.”  Deflated.

Thursday I asked Tim to take me to Indian Delight. We ordered our favorites, but instead of medium, I ordered them extra hot.  The waiter laughed and said, “I don’t think so.” I said, “I’m serious… I need to go into labor,” so he agreed to honor my request. 

That night, I barely slept.  The spicy food definitely was having some sort of effect, though it was hard to pinpoint what it was (other than indigestion).  The baby was in a strange position, and I was agonizingly uncomfortable so I sat in a recliner most of the night and worked on my ASV poster. 

Friday I stumbled into work and had minor contractions all day.  I told my friend Claire Marie I thought I might be in labor, but we just laughed it off and decided it was a probably a false alarm.  I drank a mango smoothie on the way home, just for good measure.

Last evening (still Friday) around 10:00 I got into bed fully expecting to spend another uncomfortable night not sleeping.  Tim and I were trying to think of something fun to do with Squiggles the next day.  I lay down to try to sleep, and suddenly I felt something kind of pop in my abdomen.  But nothing came out. 

Me:  My water just broke.
Tim (after assessing situation):  There isn’t any water near you.
Me:  I know, but my water just broke.
Tim:  Ummm… there’s no water.
Me:  I can’t explain it, but …

And then there was a little water.  At which point, I got out of bed and felt a full-blown Hollywood-worthy gush.  We hadn’t actually packed a hospital bag, so Tim scrambled around for toiletries and clothes while I had a lovely experience with some diarrhea. I became terrified of giving birth and decided that what really sounded good was a nice, warm, shower,  so I got in and leisurely washed my hair.  Tim came in the bathroom and said, “Ummm… did you remember that you’re in labor?” 

I gave  Squiggles a kiss goodbye (I may or may not have been crying and convinced that I would die in childbirth) and we sped off to the hospital.  By the time we got there, I was having some fairly severe contractions… back labor… but I tried to have a good attitude.  Tim took this photo (titled I don’t want all these nice people to think I’m a total wimp).

I met the labor and delivery nurse (Meesha) and Doctor Bhindya, and they confirmed that I was indeed in labor.  They asked me what my plans were as far as pain management, and I said, “I would like me one of those newfangled epidurals.”  They laughed and said, “Smart girl.”  (I’m pretty sure that if I had said, “I’m going totally natural,” they would have said the same thing and been just as supportive.)

I had to wait for said pain relief while they took care of my penicillin IV (I’m group-B-Strep positive) and some paperwork.  In the meantime, my contractions were getting extremely painful and I took this photo of myself (titled Where the hell is that epidural?):

Just when my contractions were becoming unbearable, the blessed anesthesiologist arrived to save the day.  I felt a ton of relief almost immediately and told the nurse I intended to sleep through the night and asked her to wake me up when it was time to have a baby. 

My epidural definitely worked better on my left side than my right, so at about 5:30 in the morning, I rang the nurse and asked for some more epidural.  She asked me to explain my complaint and I told her it just wasn’t working on my right side because I could still feel the contractions in the right side of my back and bum.  She correctly guessed that what I was really feeling was the baby’s head pressing on my pelvic floor.  When she checked me, I was pretty much fully dilated, but given the large size of the fetus, she wanted me to wait as long as I could to allow the baby’s head to come down as far as possible in order to minimize the pushing I would have to do.  She said there would be a lot less tearing that way, but that I could start pushing as soon as I felt ready and it was a matter of how much pressure I could manage.

I tried to go back to sleep, but I could feel a ton of “pressure” (read: pain) in my pelvis with every contraction.  Finally I buzzed her and said, “I think I’m ready to push.”  We woke up Tim and they helped me do a couple warm-up pushes before the doctor arrived.  I started the warm-ups at 6:43.  When Doctor Bhindya came back, she assessed the situation and said, “Good job – this baby is pretty much going to slide out.”  That was music to my ears because there had been much made of the fact that my baby had a very large head and was large for her gestational age.  I was so terrified of ripping my lady parts to shreds.

They helped me push and were so, extremely supportive and encouraging.  At 7:01, the doctor said, “Eh, give me one more little push even though you’re not having a contraction.”  I did as she said, and WHOOSH – out came the baby!   They slapped her on my chest (as I had requested), and I felt an incredible endorphin euphoria – maybe the kind that my natural-childbirth friends experience.  Somehow I got the best of both worlds.  Best of all was the gorgeous baby screaming in my arms.

Tim and I looked each other in the eye, and I could tell we had experienced the same thing:  love at first sight.  She was perfect!

I can’t emphasize enough how much I loved my nurse and doctor.  They were like midwives – so caring and nurturing and supportive and encouraging, and my childbirth experience was so fantastic because of them.

Tim was also a rock star.  He was loving and compassionate and didn’t leave my side for a second, even though he is on a demanding medical sub-internship and has barely slept the past two weeks.  As soon as the baby was born, it was clear that he was smitten.  He couldn’t stop smiling.

So was I!

So was Nana!

And Squiggles loves her squeaky new toy!

We are so happy and thankful and blessed. 

37.5 weeks

I can’t believe I’ve made it this far!  Friday afternoon, I had another ultrasound to determine the growth rate of the baby.  The woman who performed the ultrasound was really funny and kept saying things (in a Russian accent) like, “I can only estimate, but my estimate is that this baby is… not small.”  She estimated her weight at about 8 lbs., 8 oz.  She showed me a shot of her belly and said, “The baby has a very cute belly… a little chubby belly.”  She also found a shot of her nostrils which she seemed to think was hilarious.

I have a doctor’s appointment tomorrow – Tim says I don’t have a prayer of being induced early since the baby is within a perfectly normal weight range.  I’m hoping for a week from tomorrow.  I’d like my sister Cami to be back from vacation, but I also would like to give birth as soon as humanly possible. :-)

The baby has dropped considerably – I can feel her wiggling about very low, and I feel a constant pressure on my pelvic floor.  Hopefully that is a good sign of labor to come shortly!  We finished moving last week and I ended up carrying some rather heavy boxes around.  As a result, I have had a lot of sciatica pain for the last week and it’s really difficult for me to get up and down or walk normally.   I can’t roll over without a lot of grunting.  Squiggles likes to tease me.  When she lies down, she grunts and moans and then starts laughing and says, “I teasing Mommy!”  It’s pretty funny, I have to admit.

I can’t wait to meet this baby and find out what color her hair and eyes are, and to see the first signs of her personality.  I cleaned off my bench and desk at work just in case I go into labor tonight. :-)  I know it’s a long shot, but I can’t help hoping.

35 weeks, and the fetus is still a fetus

Woo hoo!  I haven’t given birth yet – this is officially the most pregnant I have ever been. 

The baby moves position several times a day.  One minutes she’ll be head down in birthing position, then suddenly she’ll decide she wants to hang out by my ribs again.  My belly shape is constantly changing.  Tim and I get a big kick out of watching an elbow (or knee - who knows?) move from one side of my belly to the other.  I have decided that she is doing swimmer’s kick turns in my belly.  It’s the only explanation for the sudden and drastic changes in position.  We’ll have to take her to the pool when she’s done doing time in the womb and test out my theory. 

Squiggles is getting ready for the new baby.  She loves to lift up my shirt and say, “Hi, Baby Sister” in a high, sing-song voice.  It’s adorable.  But every time we see a cute toy or outfit in a store and I say, “Should we get this for Baby Sister?” she responds with, “No, mine!”   Ha ha… we’re in a for an adjustment period, I can tell already.

I have been feeling utterly exhausted the last couple days.  Yesterday I felt like I completely crashed, and today hasn’t been much better. I have a feeling my iron is really low again – I don’t seem to have enough energy to walk from room to room, and every time I sit down, stand up, or even sneeze or cough, I see stars and feel like I’m going to faint.  We got steaks for dinner and I’ve been popping iron pills, so hopefully things will improve.  We got gym memberships and I’m dying to go swimming.  I haven’t been for a couple weeks and I need to get back in the water – it feels so good to swim laps.

Also, it has been in the high nineties the last few days, with nearly 100% humidity.  This weather is a special kind of hell for this eight-months-pregnant gal.  :-)

But… it’s going to be over soon.  Can’t wait to meet this little kick-turning, sleep-stealing butterball baby.  I love her so much already, and I know it just gets amplified a thousand times after birth.

33 weeks

I went in for my 33 week checkup this week (the doctor wants to see me much more frequently now because I gave birth early with Squiggles).  Dr. MacKenzie often has medical students working with him, and this week, he had a new student:  a friend of mine from my PhD program (she recently finished and is back in medical school).  It was fun to have her be my “doctor” for the visit.

Everything looked great, except my fundal height was measuring bigger than expected.  Dr. MacKenzie had me go to the hospital the next day for some ultrasound scans just to make sure everything was okay. 

I haven’t spoken with the doctor yet, but I requested a copy of the scans to be put on a CD, and showed them to Tim when he got home.  He said everything was in a “normal” range. 

However… drumroll…

The baby is estimated to already be 6 pounds!  Ahhhhhh!!!!  I’m so glad she’s healthy, but I’m a little terrified to give birth now.  Squiggles was born at 34 weeks, and she was barely 5 pounds.  Most of the baby’s measurements were average for somebody who is about 36 weeks along (they print the averages on the scans).  This baby already weighs as much as Squiggles did when she was about 7 weeks old. :)  D’oh!  Long labor ahead.l  I’m a little relieved because if I give birth early again, at least the baby will be in good shape to start out in the world.

32.5 weeks

I can’t believe this pregnancy is mostly over. It seems like I’m going to pregnant forever and ever.  I sometimes have a hard time conceptualizing this baby ever being anywhere other than my belly (more specifically, sitting on top of my bladder).  I am so, so, so, so, so excited to actually hold this baby… in my ARMS.

Next week is the dreaded 34-week mark!  I am having a baby shower at 34 weeks, 2 days… exactly how far along I was when my water broke with Squiggles.  I’ll be happy when that day comes and goes… hopefully with only the baby shower to count as an exciting event.

I’m totally smitten with the baby already.  She sticks her bum against my abdomen right above my belly button, so I pat it and sing her songs.  This seems to encourage her, and she sticks her bum out even further. If I feel her back, I rub it, and she sticks it out further as though to say, “More, more!”   Maybe this baby will actually enjoy cuddling!

We have been going on walks to the pond almost every day, and I try to swim and lift weights at the gym a couple times a week.  I keep trying yoga, but I start having contractions whenever I try to do any core exercises / stretches (downward dog, plank, etc.). 

I am so uncomfortable in so many ways that I have stopped keeping track.  The other day, one of my professors (John) asked me why I was limping.  I honestly hadn’t really noticed.  I shrugged my shoulders, and he said, “Just another pregnancy thing?”  (He has two kids).  I said, ""Yeah, I guess.” 

My uterus is taking up the spaces formerly reserved for not only my bladder, but also my diaphragm, stomach, ovaries, intestines, and probably lungs.   I have to pee every hour, preferably every half hour, and I’m constantly wheezing because I can’t catch my breath.

But I know it is all worth it.  Like I said, I can’t wait to meet this baby.  I’m so excited I could pee my pants.  Literally.

31 weeks

I had a checkup Thursday, and everything looks good.  My cervix is partially effaced, but not dilated at all.  Phew!

The baby is extremely active right now – I feel her off and on all day, and if I had to guess, I’d say she turns herself around and upside down approximately 6 times a day.  That’s probably not possible, but that’s what it feels like.  Her movements are visible on the outside, and it always makes me laugh to see my belly change shape or get jabbed outward.

I’m starting to get a bit nervous about labor and childbirth, I guess because I’ve never given birth to a full-sized baby.  My birth “team” is going to consist of Tim and Cami… Cami is the designated photographer. I’d invite Lance, but he’ll still be in Utah.  At Mount Auburn Hospital, they will only let me have three people present, so it can’t be another party (Tim, Cami, Karen, my mom, and my dad) like when Squiggles was born.  That was a lot of fun – seriously.

I’m still pretty puffy… hoping to shed some water weight before it gets super hot. We are moving in a couple weeks, so things are going to get really busy.  And... unfortunately, the morning sickness seems to be back.  Not as bad as weeks 8-16, but ... ughhh.  The last few days have been a bit of a struggle.  Oh well.. only 8 more weeks!  Wahoooo!  I'm so excited to kiss this baby's face off.